Colorado Wedding Ministers

We Do I Do For YOU!

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Just for Fun!

 

Party 1: I, -------, choose you, -------, to be my husband/wife. In front of our friends and family gathered here I promise to love and cherish you throughout the good times and bad times. I promise to try to remember to put down the toilet seat and to replace the toilet roll when it finishes. I promise to remember this day with love and roses. I will love you always.

Party 2: I, ---------, choose you, ---------, to by my husband/wife. In front of our friends and family, I promise to love and cherish you through every obstacle that may come into our path. I promise to learn how to change a tire and how to refill the screen wash when it runs out. I will comfort you when your team loses and drink beer with you when they win. I will love you always.
 

Funny Money

Party 1: I, -------, take you --------, to be my lawfully wedded husband/wife, to have and to hold and to be financially responsible for from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; from this day forward until death do us part.

Party2: I, --------, take you -------, to be my lawfully wedded husband/wife... for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, for when you buy all those expensive toys...

Redneck Wedding Vows

  1. I, Zeke, take you Wanda, to be my wife, to so that you clean up my beer cans and wipe the foam off my mouth when I've had too much to drink. Be good to my dog, and we'll get along just fine.
  2. With this beer tab, I thee wed. Don't nag me or take the guns from my gun rack without asking. In the Lord's name, Amen.
  3. I take you to be my cherished partner, to go with me to all NASCAR races and to stay home and rear our batch of toothless and shoeless children. I promise to protect you using lethal force if necessary and if I'm not too drunk.
  4. As the Lord and friends today are my witness, I promise to be good to you and your gabby friends, not make you do too much housework and come back every several days even when I'm out hunting.
  5. To my kissing cousin, I thee wed, I promise not to give you the gene that will cause a bunch of high forehead children. I also promise not to get drunk on Thursdays and to bring home a possum and a coon every once in a while for dinner.

Football vs. Fashion

Party 1: I promise to love you as much as the Chicago Cubs and not hold your black and white striped dress against you. From this day forward, I will listen to all of your complaints about the mall if you say them during the off season, and promise to retire my baseball cap and face paint for public outings. I will love you in sickness and in health, from this day forward, until death parts us, or you become a White Sox fan.

Party 2: I promise to love you as much as I love my credit card and not hold your poor fashion sense against you. I will only show you my new clothes during commercial breaks and promise to keep you in the latest Cub fashions. From this day forward, I will make sure your lucky shirt is washed for every game day, and will have plenty of potato chips on hand. I will love you for richer or poorer, as long as our credit limit stays high.

For the Love of our Pets

Party 1: I promise to love and cherish you as much as I do our dog, Snufflebottom. From this day forward, I will lint roll the chairs whenever your parents visit. I will love you in sickness and in health, as long as you take care of the vet visits. I promise to cuddle with you as much as I do Snufflebottom and pick you up treats whenever he gets some, too.

Party 2: From this day forward, I promise to declaw my cat Fizzywigg so that you are not scratched. I will always make sure the litter box is clean and will keep Fizzywigg off of Snufflebottom’s bed. I will love you for richer or poorer, so long as Fizzywigg gets gourmet cat food.

 

Rhymes of love

I John, take you Mary, to be my lawfully wedded wife.
To be together in happiness and strife,
To have and to hold,
Even if your cooking grows mold.
I love you in richness and in debt,
And cherish all moments since we have met.
I promise to love you until the end of my days,
As long as you stay out of my baseball plays.
I pledge to be faithful
Even when we’re old and dusty

Even More~

Party 1: I, (Name), choose you, (Name), to be my husband/wife. In front of our friends and family gathered here I promise to love and cherish you throughout the good times and bad times. I promise to try to remember to put my dirty clothes in the hamper and to replace the toilet paper roll when it's empty. I promise to remember this day with love and roses. I will love you always.

Party 2: I, (Name), choose you, (Name), to by my husband/wife. In front of our friends and family, I promise to love and cherish you through every obstacle that may come into our path. I promise to learn how to check the oil in my car and how to roll up a garden hose. I will comfort you when your team loses and drink beer with you when they win. I will love you always

 

Party 1: “I, (Name), promise to count every penny that comes into our grasp, and account for it using two-column ledgers and everything your accountant has done previously. I promise to love you, (Name), unconditionally, in sickness and in health, till death do us part, even when you feel the need to accessorize with $400 shoes.”

Party 2: “I, (Name), promise to love and cherish you, (Name), for the rest of our lives, even through your love for sports cars, dirt bikes, and Fender guitars.”

 

Party 1: “I, (Name), promise to love you, (Name), even through your need to listen to girly rock of the 1980s. I will learn to love the Bangles, Cyndi Lauper, Debbie Gibson, and Madonna as much as I love you. I promise for now and forever not to criticize your music choice.”

Party 2: “I, (Name), promise to love you, Phillip, forever, even after nights of beans and broccoli.”

 

 

 

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